Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
