Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
