he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Randomize
