Plan B is the new Plan A
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
