i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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