she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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