Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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