Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
