So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I think your dad took our porno
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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