why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
