i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
