me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
