last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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