I'm eating all of the evidence.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
last night I used snow as a chaser
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
