Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
