how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
