...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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