her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
