Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
A+ Viking dick
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
