Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
