what if every blade of grass was a penis?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
