idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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