Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
