When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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