I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Randomize
