Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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