Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
