i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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