so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
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