Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
