apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
