I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
