she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Everything about him screamed your future.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize