i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Randomize
