I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Randomize