Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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