I have demons in me.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
