Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
