Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I need help removing her.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
