do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
