fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
