Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
