My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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