he shaved USA in his pubs
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
