So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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