I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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