I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
