If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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