a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
