i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
